Sunday, February 22, 2015

Becoming Your Own Hero!

What do you think of when you look at this photo?

Do you think, wow that takes a lot of practice, determination, and stamina to accomplish such a feat! You go girl!

Or, do you think, this photo is exploiting to women. Pole dancing is demeaning to women and contributes to low self esteem in women who do not look like this?

How dare she post a photo like this in a spiritual blog!

Was your first response to the photo positive or negative?

If it was positive, YAY YOU!!!

Today's post is all about letting go of judgement.

Sometimes we are so accustomed to passing judgement we don't even realize we are doing it. We see a photo or hear a song on the radio or see something on television that elicits a specific emotional response.

That emotional response is a clue to us on an area of our subconscious we need to work on. Anytime we feel a negative emotional response based on something we see, hear, feel, smell, or taste, there is a clue that we have an unresolved issue that was just triggered by that emotional response.

For example, if seeing a woman pole dancing brings up within us the thought that this woman is being sexually exploited, we are saying that there is something wrong with the act of sex, or a particular aspect of the act of sex. We are assuming the woman is not enjoying what she is doing. We are projecting our feelings onto someone else.

If, however, we can look at this photo and say... that's impressive.. or.... if I tried, I could do that, then we are looking at the photo without judgement. Truth be told, there is no real sexual implication in this photo whatsoever. 

What if we said, oh that makes people who are large feel bad about themselves.. it implies that everyone has to be thin to be acceptable.. 

Another judgement.

We are assuming that large people feel bad about themselves. We are perhaps internalizing something we feel about ourselves.

One way to get to the core issue is to ask ourselves why the emotional response was triggered in the first place.

For example, if we thought to ourselves, this is not a spiritual photo, how dare she post this on a spiritual blog?


Perhaps we think that there are specific rules about what is and is not acceptable.


Because showing a woman half clad upside down on a pole is not acceptable or spiritual.


Because if I tried to do this and present myself as a spiritual person I would not be accepted.


Because I allow certain rules of society to dictate to me what is and isn't spiritual.


Because I am afraid of being rejected.


Because I am afraid of not being loved.

If we reduce all of our judgements down to the core issue, almost every time we can reduce it to a fear of some kind, and especially, the fear of not being loved.

What if we circumvented the whole process and just decided that no matter what, we would decide to love ourselves and do what gives us joy?

How freeing that would be!

The next time you are tempted to judge, think about this.  WHY? Why do you feel this particular emotional response? Does it go back to something you were taught, something you experienced, something you were led to believe?

What about judging ourselves?

We do this every day.. I am not good enough. I am not smart enough, pretty enough, talented enough, young enough, old enough, thin enough,  I am not enough.

If this photo elicited a response that oh, I am not ..... enough, decide today to change that thought.

You are enough. You are completely loved. There is nothing to fear.

If we cease from judging, we become our own heros. We begin to create a utopia right here in our own skin.

Whether or not we can hang upside down on a pole half clad will not matter. We will honor the right for this girl to do it and feel wonderful about herself, to feel sexy, to feel accomplished, to feel joy. And we will feel joy about feeling good about ourselves no matter whether we can do a similar activity or not.

This is your assignment.

The next time you are tempted to judge someone or something, ask yourself why?

Get down to that core issue.

Let it go. Allow whatever sparked your judgement to go and just allow it to be.

Know you are loved. You are accepted.

You are your own hero.

Sunday, February 15, 2015

Dancing in the Fountain of Life!

 Lately I have taken some time off from blogging, marketing, marrying people, and offering my services to the public. At first it was not really a voluntary vacation.

I was exhausted. Working at the Post Office, getting up early, then seeing clients or writing blogs or marketing myself all afternoon was taking its toll. I was no longer enjoying myself.

Yes, every morning I would get up and on the way to work, I would send out love and light to everyone who came to mind, offering my services to Spirit to whomever needed my help, whether it was spiritual help or maybe just they forgot to put a stamp on their letter. I was babysitting grandchildren, seeing clients after work, teaching classes on weekends, or performing weddings.

One morning I got up and I said to Spirit (and I believe also to my husband): so sorry. I am not available to be of service. I am exhausted. I need a break.

Sometimes we who are in the business of helping others forget that we have come into this world not just to be of service. We are here to experience joy and enjoy life!

I have come to learn that when Spirit tells us we need a break we better listen. If we don't then Spirit will turn circumstances around so that the break we take is not voluntary. For years my back would go out when I was in need of a break. I would find myself lying in the bed for sometimes up to two weeks, and then recuperating for up to three months. One morning, the last time my back went out, I said to Spirit, "can't you find some other way to get me to slow down? This is painful and I don't like it!" That was the last time my back failed me. Since then it has been other things.

I am finally taking breaks now before Spirit has to do it for me.

The word for today is... go out and do something fun!

If you are in the position, like I am here in Virginia of finding yourself in a location where it is impossible to go dance through a fountain because it is 17 degrees outside, then find your own fun! Watch a movie! Take a bubble bath! Go the the gym! (my preferred method of fun!) I am even planning on adding a kickboxing class to my weekly routine. And yes, I moved around some clients to fit this in!

We don't have to always be available to be of service to Spirit!

Spirit knows me.

I have found myself in the position of being on the elliptical machine at the gym and finding a spirit watching me. Yes I took the time to help him. Yes, if Spirit needs me I am willing to help.

Our bodies are made to require sleep for a reason. We need time to recuperate. We need time to reboot.

I am feeling like Spirit is telling me that there are a lot of servants to Spirit out there who are exhausting themselves trying to give of themselves to the world and to Spirit and are not having fun anymore!

If you feel you are not having fun anymore, let me encourage you to take a break! 

When I stopped trying to make things happen and decided to just enjoy my life and allow Spirit to do my marketing, guess what! Clients starting finding me without all those hours of marketing.

Yes it is a wonderful thing to be of service to Spirit. Yes I love what I do! 

I love it even more now that I have started sleeping again and going to the gym!

Guess what! The world is going to continue to rotate around the sun. The sun will come up and go down again. Life does go on.

Get up and do something fun today. If the weather is not conducive to a romp through a fountain, find something else to do that will wash away your cares and reignite your joy. 

Life is meant to be enjoyed. If we can help others also find joy in their journey, then so much the better. But don't give away your joy to be of service to others. You can't give to others what you don't have.

Be a blessing. To yourself first and then to others.

Sunday, January 18, 2015


Have you felt like you have struggled to fulfill your purpose in life?

Maybe you are not even sure what that purpose is, or perhaps what you thought was your purpose has not materialized the way you envisioned.

You have perhaps felt like giving up. It seems much easier to just quit, to go back to whatever you were doing before you "heard the call."

The message I have heard from Spirit for this year is...

Don't quit!
This is your year to shine! 

It is time to let go of the struggle. It is time to get off the highway of.. this is hard, and instead, allow yourself to get in the flow of allowing those blessings and opportunities to manifest.

When we feel like it is hard to make something happen, that it is a lot of work, that progress is slow and difficult, then it will be!

Yes, last year it seemed like to me that I worked hard, that everything I tried to manifest came amidst a great deal of work and struggle.

This year, I decided to take a different approach.

I decided that I was just going to allow Spirit to do the work. 

Spirit told me that this year my "theme" for the year was SHINE.

That means, all I have to do is shine my light. I don't have to struggle to make sure that my light gets seen, or noticed. Yes, I have to market, but I don't have to spend hours in front of the computer learning about marketing, struggling to get my messages out there.

When you turn on a light, you don't have to plead with the light to shine. You don't have to cast out the darkness. You just have to flip the switch and trust that the light will shine.

This year, allow yourself to shine.

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Goodbye 2014, Hello 2015

At the beginning of 2014, I connected with Spirit and asked what was my theme going to be this year.. and Spirit replied... grace..

I didn't really understand until a little over half way through the year I was called to my father's bedside as he crossed over to the other side.

This was probably the most difficult month of my life. My mom had passed in 2007, but she had been sick and I anticipated her graduation, and sometimes prayed for it, knowing her pain and suffering. Even though it had been difficult, Dad was worse. He was still relatively active, given his age and health issues. His accident had been a big surprise, and my sister and I were placed in the position of watching him teeter between life and death for two weeks. We were not sure he knew who we were, or if we were making the decisions concerning his care that he would have wanted.

Grace was definitely the correct theme for the year.

Thanks Spirit.

Looking back, the past year for me has been laced with many blessings as well as challenges.

I was blessed to have joined in marriage many couples in Maryland, Virginia, and West Virginia, including my first same sex couple. I am very pleased that our country is finally beginning to recognize that equal rights for all should be a non issue, and guaranteed to all of our citizens, no matter if everyone agrees or not.

I was blessed to meet many new friends and begin to expand my horizons as my husband and I gave our first joint lecture on the compatibility of science and spirit. It has been so refreshing to have the most important man in my life be able to explain scientifically why the "woo woo" stuff I do really works.

I published my second book, Journey to Joy, Confessions of a Born Again Christian Turned Psychic Medium. I had been commissioned by Jesus Himself to write this book, and I had said no for over two years. Some of my friends laugh when I say that I initially said no to Jesus, and that perhaps a better title would have been.... the girl who said no to Jesus and lived to tell about it... and I will admit that He can be very insistent at times.

I have forged many wonderful relationships this year with new clients, students, and colleagues. We all need a circle of people around us who lift us up when we are down and for whom we do the same.

I think it's important to look back on our year with an objective heart and mind, thanking the hard times and the good times for the lessons we learned and the strength we gained from each experience, good or bad.

As we say goodbye to another year and look forward to 2015 with hope and anticipation, my prayer and intention for each of you is that you live up to the person you really are inside and most of all that you see the wonderful soul that you are.

In numerology we are going into an 8 year. I have always loved 8's, but they are not always the easiest of numbers. Yes, eights represent harvest, abundance, new beginnings, and blessings. In the tarot the 8 card is the card of strength:

( image came from my go to online souce: wikipedia)

This card indicates that sometimes we may have to tame a lion in order to seize our blessings. Nothing worth gaining ever comes without some effort. Yes, we can choose to allow our blessings to come flowing towards us like a river, but sometimes this requires some effort on our parts as well, since we are so used to struggling for our blessings.

Might I also mention that my dad passed in August, an 8 month, and the day I was driving to Florida to be by his side was the 8th of August. This did not escape my observation. Oh, I guess it was graduation month for him, but  my sister and I had to really go within ourselves and muster every ounce of strength we had to get through. Sometimes the blessings of the 8 come to us only we are willing to surrender our will to the will of Spirit.

As we get ready to enter a Universal 8 year (2+0+1+5 =8), I am anticipating that, yes, we will enjoy a good year, but that this year will require some taming of lions in order to find the strength that only comes from within ( the 0 in the year). There may have to be some big changes to occur (5) in order to secure new beginnings (1) in our lives and that our primary relationships (2) will also be a focus. This will require much going within and revealing of secrets (also part of the 2 energy.)

As you say goodbye to 2014 and hello to 2015, may you take some time to connect with Spirit and find your theme for the coming year. You will find that at some point in the year you will remember the theme and that within that theme you will find great comfort knowing that Spirit knew before you did what was to occur and gave you hints so that you could prepare.

Many blessings to you as you navigate your path. Thank you for being a part of my life, even if from afar. I pray that my words that I pen here from time to time have blessed you in some way or helped you as you traverse this journey toward joy.